Understanding ≠ agreement
Same way as explanation ≠ excuse. You don't have to agree with somebody, to understand them. Just relate to them, using analogies:
- person who has opposite political views — same as you, can't understand how you "can't see the obvious" and same as you, sees their view as logical and consistent
- somebody loves chocolate and hates vanilla — their tastes same as yours, only mirrored
- people you hate — hate you back, exactly the same way